top of page
  • Writer's pictureSandra Mendelson

Deepening Our Bond With Them

Updated: Jan 29, 2019

You may already know this stuff intuitively, but I thought I'd share a few horse perspectives on how to maximize our bond with them in a space of equality and mutual respect:


“I’d tell horse “owners” that the best way to connect is to:

1. open your heart

2. close your mouth

Leave the cell phones at home. Spend time with us being FULLY THERE..with no expectations and no agenda. Healing happens between you and us in the quiet spaces…when you’re not looking for it or trying. Silence is the most healing thing you can give us and yourselves. Practice it with us. Breathe. Listen. That is all.


“Please realize that we hear the thoughts in your head. If you say “I can’t” we feel your self doubt. If you say “You don’t/won’t” we feel your mistrust. Please rely less on force and more on TRUST…and positively envision what you want from us.”


“Put away the tack even for one day and really feel us as you ride bareback. We’re not looking for stuntwork; we’re talking about connection. Especially if it scares you a bit, know we are here for you.

Tell us first what you are planning; this is a huge concept in changing and deepening our relationship with you. If you treat us like furniture, we’ll show you only wood. But…if you look us in the eye with love…talk to us even if you feel silly..then you will see the heart that beats within us.


“I can tell you about respect. Humans want it, demand it but they don’t earn it and they don’t give it. That’s right- even the ones that think they do. What does respect look like? Patience- first and foremost. We don’t always learn everything as fast as you would like but we’ll catch on faster if we feel you are honestly patient with us. Respect and kindness are similar, but respect means you want me to hold my head up, have self-esteem and feel good about myself. Kindness can sometimes overlap with pity, and pity is toxic. It takes away our energy. Compassion, though, means you’re on an equal footing because you can feel and identify with what the other is going through. These may all be words but they are coupled with the actions people take so they are very powerful.

Don’t treat us as babies or as if we’re deaf; speaking softly accomplishes more. Remember our senses are much more acute than yours. See us in a true and equal partnership. People need to feel good about themselves by looking down at us, as if they are the ones helping us. Please stop this or we will never be able to all rise to the next level of what is possible. Take genuine interest in what we think, feel and experience and we will show you more than you ever dreamed.

Most animals only show you their vanilla exterior when tutti frutti lies underneath: our creativity, the full extent of our wisdom and compassion and yes- even that intelligence you humans prize so highly…You will see the full depth of it only when you see us differently first. Hold us in a picture of our highest potential and you won’t be disappointed. Until then, you will only see through the slats a partial image of our souls.”

13 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All


Noté 0 étoile sur 5.
Pas encore de note

Ajouter une note
bottom of page